Freeway Forgiveness

Don’t we all just love traffic? Not! I was on my way from Cedarburg to Pewaukee on Thursday evening at the peak of rush hour traffic. Hwy 45S seems to always become congested just after Capital Drive. This Thursday evening was no different. In order to access the 94W exit, I decided to get over into the far right lane when the slowdown began so that I wouldn’t have to fight my way over there once the traffic truly was bumper-to-bumper. I’ve gotten to a place in life where traffic jams don’t upset me like they used to. What would be the point in that? Rather, I find a way to enjoy the idle time as much as possible. This usually means I’m dancing in my seat to the music on the radio. I was enjoying a good groove to Rhianna when all of a sudden this silver Jeep Grand Cherokee with Texas license plates comes barreling up the right emergency lane….yes I said emergency lane…and cuts right in front of me. Can you believe the nerve? Oh my ego sure wanted to get into his ear. Do you think he could read my lips that formed the word “JACKASS!?” I decided my only revenge was to turn my bright lights on and leave them on until Mr. Silver Jeep Grand Cherokee from Texas rudely cut himself into the lane to the left. Well good riddance to him.

Doesn’t sound like I was very forgiving in that moment does it? I wasn’t. And I still wasn’t when I told the story to a friend the next day. But come Saturday morning, thankfully forgiveness set in. For me, forgiveness is not a way of saying I was right, you were wrong, but I’ll let it go. It’s also not a way of saying I condone what you did. For me, forgiveness is about not judging the behavior or actions of another human being. The ego likes to keep us separate by judging others as wrong or right and therefore less than or better than itself...it’s all about the separateness. The Higher Self is always aware of our Oneness. Human beings always have both and operate from one or the other at all times. By the way, I forgot to mention my drive to Pewaukee was taking me to a discussion about how do we know when we are operating from the ego or the Higher Self….oh the synchronicity, gotta love that  So, how did I get to forgiveness you may be asking? Somewhere in my unconscious mind I must have been still grumbling about this person, because on Saturday morning out of the blue I had the thoughts….you don’t know why this person was driving like a lunatic. What if someone he loved was on their death bed? What if his child was in a serious accident and he was on the way to the hospital? And really Tara, you’ve never made a bonehead move in traffic? Ha! Hmmm, why am I all of a sudden feeling compassion for this guy? It didn’t really matter the why, the point was I had no idea the why of it. I just knew in that moment, the situation was an opportunity for me to practice forgiveness. I may not have practiced it right while it was happening, but getting to it even 2 days later I felt the tension flow from my body. What a beautiful feeling that was. What a gift the situation was to remind me I never know what is going on with another person so how can I possibly make a judgment about their behavior in any given moment. Thank you Mr. Silver Jeep Grand Cherokee from Texas for being my teacher.

The holidays are an especially emotionally-charged time of year. The hustle and bustle of everyone trying to find just the right gift; get to this store for that gift and that store for this gift; many are in their own little world and not aware of how they are interacting with others. Now might be a particularly good time to practice forgiveness.

Note: I have no idea if it was a man or woman driving that vehicle. I used one gender to make the story telling easier. I’m fully aware women can drive just as crazy as men.